And When We Say 'Nil,' We Really Mean 'Nil'

Yeeeeeee-ch.

The Portland Timbers certainly managed to put together an unappetizing evening against Endangered Species FC tonight. The nil:one loss to the league-leading Rochester Raging Rhinos wasn't a rout, obviously, but neither was it the sorta plucky, richly-studded-with-moral-victories-and-glimmers-of-promise loss that leaves the fanboy afire for the next fixture.

On my first viewing of the retrofitted '06 Timbers, in fact, I believe I recognized the Timbers of old—oft caught in possession, frequently missing a non-concrete first touch on the ball, less than brimming with ideas in the midfield. Our strikers made next to no impression, but in their defense, incisive crosses were not exactly strafing the Rochester homeland. And have we ever—EVER—in modern Timbers history scored from a corner kick?

There is only one solution. We need fresh bodies. And by that, I mean the Toronto Lynx. Bring forth the sacrifice!